爱笑的人，运气总不会太差，因为笑可以让人充满正能量，更能让自己面对挫折，勇往直前，以下笑话希望能让你爆笑每一天。
【英语笑话带翻译短一些1】
One Side of the Case A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should beexcused, and one man raised his hand. "I can't hear out of my left ear," the man told the judge.
"Can you hear out of your right ear?" the judge asked. The man nodded his head.
"You'll be allowed to serve on the jury," the judge declared. "We only listen to one side of thecase at a time."
一面之词
一位法官问我们这群修补陪审员是否有人应当免权。一个人举起了手。
“我的左耳听不见。”那人告诉法官。
“你的右边耳朵听得见吗?”法官问道。那人点了点头。
“我们允许你加入陪审团，”法官宣布。“我们每次只听一面之辞。”
【英语笑话带翻译短一些2】
St Peter's question
圣彼德的问题
Three men, a doctor, an accountant and a lawyer are dead and they appear in front of StPeter. St Peter tells them that they have to answer one question in order to get to Heaven. Helooks at the doctor and asks, "There was a movie that was made about a ship that sank afterhitting an iceberg, what was its name?" The doctor answers, "The Titanic" and he is sentthrough. He then looks at the accountant and say, "How many people died in that ship?"Fortunately the accountant had just watched the movie and he answers, "1 500!". St Petersends him through and then finally turns to the lawyer and commands, in a very heavy voice, "Name them!".
有三个人死了，分别是一名医生、一名会计和一名律师。他们来到了圣彼德面前。圣彼德对他们说，如果他们想进入天堂，就得每人回答一个问题。圣彼德看着医生开始发问，“以前电影院放过一部电影，说的是一艘船撞击冰山后沉没，电影的名字是什么?” 医生回答，“<<泰坦尼克号>>”，医生随即被允许进入天堂。然后圣彼德看着会计说，“船上有多少人遇难?”。会计很走运，因为他刚看过这部电影，回答道，“1500人遇难。”圣彼德把会计也放进天堂了。最后，圣彼德转过身，看着律师，非常严肃地用命令的口吻问道，“把1500人的名字都说出来?”
【英语笑话带翻译短一些3】
Reached Shore Fast
快速靠岸
A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car brokedown. He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raisesomeone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance. He climbed into his boat, clicked onthe radio and said, "Mayday, mayday." A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State yourlocation." "I-75, two miles south of Standish." After a very long pause, the officer asked, "Howfast were you going when you reached shore?"
在休伦湖钓完鱼后，我的一个朋友开车拖着他的船回家。路上车坏了。他没带手机，不过，他想，也许他可以通过海事无线广播来请求公路援助。于是，他爬到他的.船里面，启动了无线装置，喊道，“求救，求救”。一名海岸护卫队警官作出了回应，“报告你的位置”。“I-75号公路，Standish的南面两英里”。沉默了好一会之后，警官问我的朋友，“你的船靠岸时开得有多快?”
【英语笑话带翻译短一些4】
One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all hissums right.
一天，蒂姆的数学老师看了他的作业，发现他全做对了。
The teacher was very pleased and rather surprised.
老师很高兴，同时也十分惊讶。
He called Tim to his desk and said to him, "You got all your homework right this time, Tim. Whathappened? Did your father help you?"
他把蒂姆叫到桌前说："蒂姆，你这次的作业全都做对了，怎么回事?你爸爸帮你做了吗?"
"No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself," said Tim."
"不，先生，我爸爸昨天很忙，我不得不全由自己做。"