导语：经常讲一些笑话，不仅能给自己到来快乐，还能感染他人，这里小编收集整理了英语幽默笑话带翻译5则，一起来看看吧!
1 肚里就不会长虫了!
A father was trying to teach his son the evils of alcohol.
He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the
water lived, while the one in the whiskey curled up and died.
"All right, son," asked the father, "What does that show you?"
"Well, Dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol, you will not have worms."
一位父亲打算让自己的儿子知道酒精有多么可怕。他把分别把两只虫子放到一杯清水和一杯威士忌里做对比。清水里虫子安然无恙，结果威士忌里的虫子蜷缩了几下就挂掉了。"所以，儿子啊，"父亲问道，"得出什么结论?" "恩，这说明，你只要喝酒的话，肚里就不会长虫了!"
2 向别人做鬼脸
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms Smith stopped to gently
reprimand the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child
I was told if I made ugly faces, my face would freeze and stay like that". Bobby looked up and
replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."
史密斯小姐发现她的一名学生在操场上向别人做鬼脸，便去轻责他。
这位主日学校的老师甜甜地微笑着，说："博比，我小的时候，有人告诉我如果我做鬼脸，我的脸就会僵硬，永远都那么丑。" 博比抬头看了看老师，说："史密斯小姐，你可别说没人警告过你啊。"
3 哪个月有28天
Dad:?Tom,?please?tell?me,?which?month?has?28?days??Tom:?Every?month.?
爸爸：告诉我汤姆，哪个月有28天呢??汤姆：每个月都有啊!
4 可怜的丈夫
The poor husband
"You can't imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife," the man complained to his friend. "She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.
可怜的丈夫
“你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的.难，”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说，“她问我一个问题，然后自己回答了，过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。
5 鸟窝与头发
Nest and Hair
My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom.
"What kind of bird?" my sister asked.
"I didn't see the bird, ma' am, only the nest," replied the child.
"Then, can you give us a description of the nest?" my sister encouraged her .
"Well, ma'am, it just resembles your hair. "
鸟窝与头发
我姐姐是一位小学老师。一次一个学生告诉她说一只鸟儿在教室外树上垒了个窝。
“是什么鸟呢?”我姐姐问她。
“我没看到鸟儿，老师，只看到鸟窝。”那孩子回答说。
“那么，你能给我们描述一下这个鸟巢吗?”我姐姐鼓励她道。
“哦，老师，就像你的头发一样。”