让人捧腹大笑的英语笑话

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恭维话 Compliment

让人捧腹大笑的英语笑话

Compliment

"Larry! Come here!" said his furious mother, putting the telephone down, " I’ve just had a call   from Mrs. Harrison about your behavior to her Doris at the school dance last night. You wretched, rude boy!"

"I was nice to her, Mum, really I was!" protested the youth.

"I even paid her a compliment when we had a dance."

"Did you, indeed?" said his mother grimly, "And what exactly did you say?"

"I said, Gosh, Doris, you sweat less than any fat girl I’ve ever danced with!"

恭维话

“拉里,你过来!”妈妈放下电话后生气地说,“我刚才接到哈里森夫人地电话,她告诉我你在昨晚的学校舞会上对多丽丝行为不好,你可耻,粗鲁!”

“妈妈,我对她很好,真的!”小伙子不服气地说。“当我和她跳舞时我还说了一句恭维她的话。”

“你真的这么做的吗?”妈妈严厉地问。“你的'原话是怎么说的?”

“我说,啊呀,多丽丝,你比我跳过舞的任何胖姑娘出汗都少!”

I'm Glad 我很高兴

A Sunday school teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. Now, children, said she, has anyone of you ever made someone else glad?Please, teacher, said a small boy, I've made someone glad done. Who was that?My boy. Now tell us how you made your grand mother se, teacher, I went to see her yesterday, and stayed with her three hours. Then I said to her, ‘Granny, I'm going home,’ and she said, ‘Well, I'm glad’!

一个主日学校的老师正在对学生讲使别人高兴的重要性。现在,孩子们,她说:你们当中有谁让别人高兴过?我,老师,一个小男孩说:昨天我就使别人高兴过。做得好,是谁呢?我奶奶。好孩子,现在告诉我们,你是怎样使你奶奶高兴的。是这样的,老师。我昨天去看她,在她那儿呆了三个小时。然后我跟她说:‘奶奶,我要回家了。’她说:‘啊,我很高兴!’

大手 Big hands

Big hands

Teacher: If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have?

tudent: Big hands.

大手

老师:如果我左手上有7个桔子,右手上有8个桔子。那么我有什么?

学生:大手。
 

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